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Motherhood

20 Things They Don’t Tell You About Pregnancy, Giving Birth, & Motherhood

Some exciting news on the blog today .. Starting every other Monday (so twice a month) I’ll be doing a post on Motherhood! So mark your calendars for our Motherhood Mondays, it’s going to get real. Especially on today’s agenda … I know that sometimes my posts (especially on Instagram) can make motherhood look a little bit too glam to be real, but honestly in this digital media age, what you see isn’t the whole truth. Fact of the matter is, I’m still learning how to fine tune my life as a career women and my role as a mom. But you guys asked for honesty and so here it is…. 20 things they don’t tell you about pregnancy, giving birth, and motherhood!

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( Please keep in mind that these are just my experiences, & that every woman is different! )

1. Okay so I knew that of course my body was going to change after getting pregnant. Like one of the things was my belly button would pop out & become an “outtie,” but in my case, my belly button totally flattened out & disappeared! I had no idea it could even do that. For a few months I literally had no belly button .. it was the weirdest thing.

2. When I used to think of pregnancy I thought we just get a free pass to eat as much as we want. But actually that wasn’t really true! Your uterus is actually pushing down on your stomach so you really can’t eat a large amount at once, but I found that I was eating more frequently. And for that reason I was literally going to the bathroom every 30 minutes. I would wake up at least 6-8 times a night just to go pee. It was the most annoying thing ever because I never got to sleep through the night.

3. The craziest thing was that during child birth, no one told me that I could’ve asked for the epidermal at any time! (Silly me, I just assumed the nurse would give it to me whenever she thought it was appropriate.) But it was actually a blessing in disguise because I ended up getting it at the last minute and I had JUST enough so that I could still activate my muscles down there & push through (I pushed Chloe out in 15 minutes!). PS.Ummmm no one told me the anesthesia needle was the size of my arm!!!

4. Speaking of childbirth .. no one told me that I couldn’t eat solids or  go pee after getting pitocin.  (I had to get pitocin to increase the frequency & intensity of my contractions.) I was only able to drink liquids, which made me want to go pee, but I wasn’t able to go pee. It was the craziest feeling ever. 

5. This next one is kind of gross but okay I was not prepared for my postpartum pains down there if you know what I mean. Going to the bathroom was like a war zone.. I did not expect it to be so gnarly! Lets just say I didn’t know going to the bathroom could be so scary .. 

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6. So after Chloe came out, we were in the hospital for 3 days after for recovery. During that time it was amazing because there were nurses around the clock who helped change, bath and put Chloe to sleep. During those first few days I thought having a baby was totally easy! Then Allen and I brought her home on the first day and it was seriously til this day one of the hardest days of my life. Neither Allen or I had a clue to what we were supposed to do !

7. I know I look mostly back in shape, but like I mentioned here, the bump doesn’t just magically go away. I thought that after pushing Chloe out, my stomach would automatically deflate like a balloon. But the fluids and gunk in my stomach actually took months to digest. Even now that I work out and have been eating relatively healthy it’s still definitely an area that I have to work on.

8.  & okay .. some women look like this during their pregnancy, while other women (like me) gets a gigantic stye on her eye. During my last trimester I got this huge gross stye that completely shut my left eye and I had to get it surgically removed. I swear I looked like quasi modo during this time ugh. Throwback photos were in full effect on Instagram during this month because no one needed to see how I looked like during this time. No one told me that hormones in your body can do some crazy things to you. 

9. When I think of breastfeeding I always thought that it was kind of like drinking from a fountain. But let me tell you guys, that was not the case!! It took a lot of work and patience to even produce the tiniest amount of milk. Apparently when the baby latches on, that’s how you’re telling your body that it needs to produce milk, so my milk didn’t actually come out until a few days later. It was so frustrating, and I wanted to give up because I thought my body was not capable of producing milk, but I kept pushing forward, and on the 5th day finally I started to produce some milk!  (I had to supplement with formula in the beginning because of my no milk supply.) 

10. You’d think that once your baby is born it’d be an endless stream of love and perfection. But to be honest, the initial trial and error stage of trying to figure things out was so overwhelming that it was hard to really appreciate Chloe until I truly got the hang of it because having a baby is HARD!!! When she was first born I was so overwhelmed with joy, but after a few days into it, I was extremely tried & discouraged. I found myself crying in the bathroom because I didn’t know if I would be able to get through it all, but like everyone says, “It only gets easier and easier.”

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11. Allen’s connection was a different story. The bond between a mom and her baby is so special in that you can feed and nurture her immediately. But as a dad it’s really quite different and the connection doesn’t come until later. Allen helps me with all the diapers and running errands but in the beginning all a baby does is sleep and want to drink milk, so there’s not a whole lot for the dad to do! It really took him about 3 months to truly connect with her! Now he can’t keep his hands off of her, he’s completely obsessed with her!

12. My body has changed SO much in the past year, from getting pregnant to pushing out a baby. But even though I’ve always had wide hips, they’re definitely wider now. Although I have lost most of the weight that I gained during my pregnancy  ( i’m currently 5 lbs away from my pre pregnancy weight), there are things that will never be the same. For instance my hips are wider because my bones have moved from pushing out Chloe. Also there is stretched out skin on my belly that is not fat, it’s simply….stretched out skin. The end.

13. & No one told me that my hair would change from pregnancy! I’ve always had thick hair so I wasn’t worried that I’d lose hair after having a baby like some women do, but I definitely noticed it’s more prone to breakage. That’s actually what inspired me to do this post, 7 products for dry damaged hair. I have to part my hair in a specific way or else you could see some of the thinning and Hair loss areas on my scalp. They say it grows back eventually!!!

13. Everyone always talk about having the pregnancy glow (including me!), but no one told me that on the flip side I’d feel so unattractive & lethargic! I kind of went MIA in my third trimester because it was hard for me to find the motivation to throw on a cute outfit & makeup to face the world. All I wanted to do is lay in bed. My body was changing beyond my control, and it was so hard to feel pretty with crazy hormones overpowering my body.

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16. I never knew a baby needed so much stuff! During my baby shower I had so many friends who gifted me with a lot of things I needed like a breast pump, swaddles, diapers, wipes, etc. But still after all those generous gifts I found myself on AMAZON almost everyday, after Chloe’s arrival, ordering all sorts of  things that she needed. I never even knew half of these things existed, like this Nose Frita!

17. Because I pride myself in my work and absolutely love what I do, I thought I would immediately go back to work right away. Yes, I answered some emails here and there, and occasionally worked from home, but it actually took me 3 months to fully get back into the swing of things. And although I’m now fully back into “work” mode, I still find it hard to leave her. I’m always looking for an excuse to “work from home” now.

18. I never knew how demanding nursing was, and that I couldn’t wear whatever I wanted. Babies are milk monsters, and if you are nursing, you have to be readily available to feed them anywhere at anytime. Which means you have to be strategic with what you wear, so your boobies are accessible at all times during the day. For instance Low stretchy V necks, Loose oversized sweaters, and button up shirts or dresses are a must. You definitely want to stay away from high necklines and/or stiff material. You can watch my recent vide on Chic Nursing Outfits HERE.

19. & No one told me how heartbreaking and sad you can get from motherhood as well. Chloe got sick a few days ago and she’s getting better now, but she got a cold and couldn’t breathe well because of all the mucus in her little nose. Motherhood has been the most joyous and rewarding journey thus far, but there is nothing more heartbreaking than seeing your little one suffer.  I never knew motherhood would have such highs and such lows.

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20. Lastly, no one told me that I would have an instant bond & connection with other moms after becoming a mom myself.  There’s something incredibly humbling after giving birth. Maybe it’s because it was quite possibly the hardest thing that I’ve ever done. Knowing that other women have also gone thru the same experience gives me a reason to instantly connect and have so much respect for them.  There’s no words to describe what you just went through, and the only people that can truly understand are the women that also have gone through it themselves.  There’s this instant bond knowing that you’ve gone through the same thing .. it’s like joining a sorority! The sorority of motherhood!

I remember, as I was going through some of these moments (especially the giving birth moments) I would find myself asking my mommy friends, “Why didn’t you tell me about this???” This may sound silly, but they all said that they simply just forgot. That was hard for me to comprehend, but believe it or not, as I was going down this list today, I too can say that I totally forgot half these things. I’m telling you… #MommyBrain is a real thing!  So that’s why I’m writing this list for you guys before I forget. And you might be wondering why any of us would put ourselves through this, but now that I know the full picture (as a girl who wasn’t ready for kids just a year ago), I can honestly say that the joy that these little ones bring overpowers the pain of childbirth, the loss of freedom, and all the sleepless nights.  

“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. The mother is something absolutely new.” 

I know that I have a lot of non-mommy followers/readers, so I hope this post didn’t scare you too much! If you are soon to be a mommy, a new mommy, or a veteran by now…please do me a favor, and leave me a comment below and introduce yourself to me. I would love to get to know you ladies..after all we are in this together, right? Also please let me know if there are any topics you would like me to talk about on this “Motherhood Mondays” series.

Happy Monday everyone!

sigxo_chriselle

97 Comments
  • […] Fashion, beauty and lifestyle blogger Chriselle is also a mother to her baby girl Chloe. With a new motherhood column on Mondays, she shares her perspective as a new mom in 20 Things They Don’t Tell You about Pregnancy, Giving Birth & Motherhood: […]

  • Isela Espinoza says:

    Chriselle Thank you for all your insight on motherhood (the good the bad and the ugly)!!! I am also a new mommie and look forward to your Motherhood Monday series. Will you please do a blog post about breastfeeding at work. I will be returning to work soon and I want to continue to breastfeed my little one.
    Besitos, Isela ❤️

  • Esther says:

    hi chriselle! i just happened to stumble upon your blog through one of my friend’s fb link. i saw the adorable beach photo of you and your daughter and it immediately struck a chord with me because today i took my littlest one to the beach for the first time as well. have you been to paradise cove in laguna beach? it’s a gem… and there’s so many beautiful photo spots too! i have 3 beautiful daughters (8 yrs, 4 yrs & 5 mos) and i am absolutely loving it. i would be lying if i said that it was easy, but thankfully i have the support of my family. i starting browsing your blog and i found that i was looking up so many links to the really beautiful outfits you put together and then i saw your birth story and realized that our babies are around the same age! my little one elizabeth was born january 19. anyhow, i just got really excited so i’d thought i’d comment. btw~ chloe’s baek-il was so beautiful! can’t wait to see what her dohl will look like! -esther lee

    • Chriselle says:

      Thank you for reaching out and commenting Esther! I love meeting new mommies on my blog .. we’re in this together! Thank you and hope I see you here more often! xo

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  • Hi Chriselle! Thanks for opening up the floor like this. I had my first baby in May and named her Mary Ikram (my husband’s gender neutral name, ikram, translates into ‘noble’ (so my daughter is literally called Noble Mary)). I was e-introduced to you via Michelle Phan’s youtube channel way back when and have been hooked on your channel and blog ever since. Your work is very precise and thorough in addition to your choice of outfits and style being stellar. So glad to hear there will be a Mommy Monday! The first pic of your daughter that you shared on twitter was the cutest picture of a newborn baby I had ever seen (I was still pregnant at the time so couldn’t be bias with my own lil one!). I will stay tuned to your future posts and sharings!

  • Loraine says:

    Loved this insightful post! I’m 22 weeks pregnant and due this November and the excitement is starting to be paired with a lot of fear the further along I go. Terrified of making mistakes, screwing things (baby especially) up, not losing the pregnancy weight etc. so it’s refreshing to see such a real post about everything and realize that we aren’t super humans and things won’t be perfect, so thank you for easing my mind a bit! Looking forward to the motherhood mondays posts :) all the best to you, Chloe and Allen

  • This post is so great. I have a 3 1/2 month little girl. I completely agree with all of these points. And you are right. I would not have thought of them all by myself until I read what you wrote. Here I am shaking my head, yes, yes and yes!

  • Tish says:

    …the hardest thing I’ve ever done. My daughter is 10 weeks old … I’m still in that fourth trimester hell you spoke of… The dad’s not really being able to help… The frustration with clothes that are breastfeeding-friendly… The soft squishy stomach weirdness… Fatigue. I go back to work in a month and I’m freaking about having enough breast milk for this kid… Love to hear how you pumped enough or if you supplemented. I really miss the freedom … I feel my husband can do as he pleases but everything revolves around baby and boob. Lol I look forward to your experiences. I look at moms in awe and give gangsta nods of approval when I see a mom out with her newborn… It takes so much energy to get out!!! And the trying to get them down for naps… Forget about it! Nose fridas, gripe water, the best diapers…carriers that worked and the ones that didn’t lol… Mommy support groups… What to do when engorged… Lol this is my life.

  • Hello Chriselle

    I’ven been following your blog for some time now and I really like it. As I’m quite a bit older than you (I’m 43 going on 44…), childbirth is something from a far away past for me… I gave birth to my first child nearly 19 years ago. My 2nd child is nearly 16 and my youngest nearly 13 (she was born on my 31st birthday… quite the birthday present !!).
    As my children are a bit older now, I have absolutely no connection anymore with little babies, childbirth, pregnancies. Mind you, babies can be cute… at someone else’s place ! So when I first read the title of this post I thought I’d skip it, but then I was too curious… and although childbirth of my eldest is nearly 19 years ago, I could still recognize myself in your post ! I too was completely unaware of so many things concerning pregnancy and childbirth. I was only 24, I was the first of my family and friends to be pregnant so I couldn’t ask anyone for advise. Most of my friends were still going from party to party and although they liked the fact that ‘one of the group’ was pregnant, their cooperation stopped at asking how I went… My mother has never been a woman of too many words, so she didn’t give me heaps of advice. She just let me seek it out on my own. So as I said… I was completely unaware !
    I should’ve known about the war zone though when my mother bought me some underwear beforehand… way too big… I thought… up until I saw the war zone down there :-) and up until the nurse gave me the sanitary pads, nearly the size of a toddler’s diaper… I thought one could last me at least half a day… how did I know that after half an hour I’d had to change it already…
    And what was also really awkward was that I could burst into crying those first days and weeks without there actually being something wrong… I once did my post-natal excercises whilst crying !
    Another thing no one warned me about was the labour pains after giving birth… don’t know exactly how it’s called in English… After a first child those are mostly unexisting… but after 2nd and 3rd childbirth… oh my god !! I could be in so much pain afterwards, just lying in bed, whilst visitors were in the room… Fortunately after a day or two those pains past… But I do warn you about these now !!!
    Yip, a lot of childbirth mysteries for me there… but seeing my 3 kids now… I wouldn’t NOT have them just for that !
    Love, Kathleen
    http://www.thegoodthefabandthelovely.com

  • Jayce Serquina says:

    Hi Chriselle,

    I’m 27 weeks pregnant now and enjoying your blog, social media and video posts related to pregnancy & motherhood. Living here in the Middle East as an expat is not easy for me to find people that I can relate to. I’ve been following you for years now and have experience some of your past experience too. This is actually my second pregnancy but I had miscarriage from my first. And every time I needed an advice whether it is styling related or lifestyle there you are posting about it. Lucky for me :)

    Looking forward for more Motherhood Mondays posts. Good luck and stay chic as always.

    Ps: Maybe you can post about Newborn & postpartum essentials. Thanks

    Love you

  • Mary says:

    Hi Chriselle,

    I really enjoy your blog and am so excited for the Motherhood Monday posts! I have a beautiful 7 month baby boy and am still trying to get the hang of things.
    I’d love if you could consider covering some of the following topics:
    – How do you keep your house so clean and gorgeous? My son has started taking over most of the house now that he’s crawling and our decor is slowly evolving into multi-colored themes (not in a good way!)
    – How was it like traveling with Chloe? What are some of the essential items you’d recommend to bring? Also how is traveling in NYC with an infant? Did you subway around, or take a taxi (and how hard is it to deal with the car seat?).
    – Do you have tips on eating out with an infant?

    Thanks!
    -Mary

  • Daphne says:

    Thanks so much for sharing! I’m a mommy of a 3.5 yr old girl and a 3.5 month old boy. I never thought I would be a mommy but here I am with two minions haha. One thing about postpartum that surprises new moms usually is that you’ll have the longest period in your life right after….ha! Payback for having no period for 9 months >. < anyways I really enjoyed your post and wanted to welcome you to team "no sleep"…as I write this at 3:09am while my kids are sleeping ironically. Also if you're thinking about having another one day…the 2nd is totally easier 😉 take care!!

    Ps. Chloe is such a doll!! She's so precious!

  • limpiella says:

    I am a one years-old child’s mom. I read your posts and I go back time. I swear you that things are going to be better and better. The first child’s years is the hardest. The more They grow the more indipendent they become and mom can have more time for herself. Good Luck!

  • j says:

    Hopefully this isn’t too personal but the wording for #9 had me wondering. Was your body just unable to make colostrum? Do you know some reasons why this could happen?

  • Heather says:

    Hi Chriselle, I gave birth to a boy a few days after you 1/23 so it’s been great following your journey alongside mine from pregnancy to now. Chloe is so cute! Great list – #20 was very unexpected for me too. :)

  • Emmy says:

    Hi Chriselle

    Can you pls do a video or post on good nursing bra or after pregnancy bra? I’m struggling as those I have is not strong enough to hold my breasts, especially when i sleep. My breasts tend to slip up. Thanks so much.

  • Jeanette says:

    Hi Chriselle!
    New momma here too. My baby girl is 3 months old. So looking forward to your mommy posts! Can totally relate to everything you listed. I feel like now I have a different perspective on how I confront hardships too. I find myself saying in my head, “if I can push a baby out of my body I can do this too!” Haha

    It’s so interesting how easily you can click with other moms too once you become one. It’s still surreal sometimes that I have a baby. In the beginning it just felt like there was this baby living in my house that I took care of. I would have these realizations that it’s MY kid.

    Can’t wait for more mommy posts! Chloe is so precious.
    Xoxo

  • Hi Chriselle

    I recently came across your Instagram & really enjoy your feed and now reading your blog which I enjoy immensely. Your images and stories are just beautiful! I know you are nursing and received a breast pump as a shower gift, but not sure if you use it yet. If you do pump, I was wondering if you would want to try out my product – the Pump Strap. I developed it when I was nursing and needed to go back to work and pump. It enables you to either exclusively pump, or pump and nurse at the same time hands free. If this is interesting and you would like to see more, you can see my product and a good instructional video on my website http://www.PumpStrap.com. If you think you would like to try it, I would love to send one to you. If you like it, maybe you could mention it on your feed(s). I’m still a very small business and just trying to get more awareness for my product. Thanks so much for considering it! No worries if you are not pumping. Kami

    Sincerely,

    Kami Gallaher
    Pump Strap, LLC. (www.PumpStrap.com)
    732-820-0772

  • Kaibin says:

    Thank you for posting this. I commented on one of your IG posts re: what new content your readers would like to see – realistic motherhood posts. Motherhood is not a walk in the park, and for so many, comes with daily struggles, and even depression. I had a really difficult first 6 months with my son, and there was no way I could dress up and pose the way you have, but I understand that your blog is aspirational. This post is great because it’s actually relatable. Looking forward to more of these.

  • Yeri Yoon says:

    I love this new post! I have a 3month old baby girl and she just had her 백일 two days ago. I’ve always been good with kids all my life so motherhood would be easy and I would have a blast while doing it but I’ve been struggling since the first day. I had unexpected c-section too so it took me more than 6weeks to recover. I’ve been following your IG for about a year and it seemed like pregnancy and motherhood was easy for you so I felt like I was failing it. This post really made me realize that all mothers go through same things. Thank you for sharing this it really helps me put my mind at ease.

  • This was a very thoughtful and honest post about motherhood. More honest than some I’ve read, so great job! I am a mother of 2 and it’s amazing and perplexing what pregnancy does to your body physically and also how it affects your hormones. I’m seriously NOT the same person I was pre-babies, both in good and not so good ways. Ok, actually, more in the good ways :).

  • Chaz says:

    Hi Chriselle! Thank you so much for sharing your experience. All the 20 things you listed were spot on, especially the Stye! I will be a first time mom in a few days and it feels reassuring reading your experience. I Wish you all the best on your journey on becoming a mom!
    Maybe next time you can talk about how your relationship with your husband has changed now that there’s always going to be the three of you.
    P.S. My baby’s name is going to be Danica Chloe!

  • Peggy says:

    Thanks for sharing this blog. I’m a first time mom with a 2-week old newborn baby boy and can relate to almost all the things you mentioned above (Plan to have a vaginal birth didn’t happen as I had an emergency C section). It’s silly but #18 was my biggest learning! I have a wardrobe full of clothes that I can’t nurse with. Nursing is so demanding having to feed around the clock. I have never been so naked in my life! I have been pretty much walked around our house with minimum clothing as I’m feeding on demand and boobies need to be accessible! I also find having to nurse in public extremely inconvenient having to cover up and not seeing how little one is doing. Otherwise, I am loving motherhood :)

  • Denise says:

    God, how cute are these pictures! Great post, you are so right.

    Kisses from Berlin,
    http://fashionkings.org/

  • Felecia Wong says:

    After 3 kids, I can say that everything you’ve written are so true. This post will surely help so many moms-to-be and also moms in general. I was in shock when I had my first-born. It got a little bit easier for my second and third but those first 30 days were surely challenging. So, moms, I think you are all superwomen!
    Thank you for sharing Chriselle!

  • I would love to hug you now!
    Each point is to the core truth! Maybe there are more but I forgot too. This is exactly why i jotted down my experiences in my blog.
    I am a new mom. My son is 1 year old and I am still trying to figure out motherhood! LOL!
    Each week your daughter will surprise you with what she learnt! It’s a beautiful feeling!
    Every pain was worth it!

  • monica says:

    Mom of a 2 month old baby :)

  • Alicia says:

    Hi Chriselle.

    I am a mother of two girls with a third one due in August. This post just reminds me that I have to start from zero again soon. Being a mother is not easy and I have to deal with my 4 and 2 yr old throwing tantrums at this stage. I’m not looking forward to wearing maternity bras and will miss strapless bras but telling myself that this period will end soon and I will have my 3 lovely children with me. They are my best work in my life.

  • Chong Moua says:

    Chriselle, you should try this baby nose aspirator that attaches to a vacuum. Arianna Baby Vac Nasal Aspirator, found on Amazon. I have not used it but I improvised my own version and it works magic when your baby is sick with a bad cold. It provides a gentle suction that amazing sucks out a lot of boogers. I am a mother of three boys and boy, I wish I have found this product sooner.

    Thanks for sharing your motherhood experience. Stay strong and stay real.

  • shannette says:

    A really amazing post. I hope I remember most of these things when its my time to have a baby.
    http://www.fashionobsessher.blogspot.com

  • Annie says:

    Very true and very inspiring blog post! Just because you become a mom, doesn’t mean you lose yourself, but rather you have added another item to your personal list of accomplishments and you get to join a special club! It is easy to forget some of these things so this was a good reminder and surprisingly, I can’t wait to do it all over again! Thank you so much for this post!

    – First time mommy, 9 months post partum

  • Jennie says:

    Hi Chriselle!

    Love your posts about about the mommyhood! So true! I had my son in Feb 2014 and I’m still adjusting to the wonders of motherhood! They are trying and will test your patience but I wouldn’t give it up for anything because you will never love anyone as you love your child.

    Chloe is absolutely adorable!

    Take good care!

    Jennie

  • Jo says:

    love this post! i have a little one just a month shy of yours. motherhood sure is something, who knew how hard and fast you can fall in love with someone. i never knew the vastness of my mom’s love until i became one myself. do you know of any safe beauty products that you enjoy using? i suffered some serious acne throughout my pregnancy and even still right now, but have been too scared to wear too much because i didn’t want it to harm my baby while pregnant and while nursing. also if you have any tips on work/baby life balance? i struggle wanting to go back to work everyday. being a working mom has been exhausting, i feel like i’m missing out on so much of my baby’s life and they grow up way too fast.

  • Jane says:

    Hi Chriselle, thank you for writing this post. I’m not a mum or soon to be mum. But reading this really gave me some clue of being pregnant and becoming a mom. Thank you for sharing this inspiring post. Hugs and kisses to little Chloe.

  • Sharon says:

    Hi I just want to drop a note to say I love this post and how we as readers are ‘growing’ with you in this journey..
    I am also expecting, and I find these entries really useful.. thank you for writing and sharing!
    Love,
    Sharon

  • Great, helpful and inspiring post! I’m not a mom, not yet and still swinging in between “have a baby” or “not” or “not now anyway” :-)Well, it’s never the right time, right? Plus, obviously the clock doesn’t tick back for us women at any time. Well, it’s a huge decision and responsibility and this is what’s scares me the most, I guess. Thanks for sharing your experience here!

    http://www.PurseFixation.com
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  • Alina says:

    Dear Chriselle, thank you for this post!
    My name is Alina, I live in Tokyo and gave a birth to a son 2months ago. You can’t imagine how inspiring were your posts and videos over your pregnancy and birth!!! I admire all your outfits and tried to be beautiful mummy-to-be getting ideas from your posts! (As well as trying to be a beautiful mummy now!) Also, I had the same story for the miscarriage thing, that’s why I was so happy to hear you are pregnant at that time!! Thank you for being so honest!! You are great!!!

    In the next series I would love to hear about your regime of the day with baby, about Chloe’s toys and ideas for her entertainment, also about your workout and what you are eating!!
    Thank you!! Xoxo

  • Tashi says:

    So excited you started this series Chriselle,, i have always been following you and boy was i excited when you and I both were having a baby girl. My daughter was born just a week after yours :)
    Looking forward to motherhoodmondays :)

  • Jenny says:

    As a mother of two boys, 4 and 6 year old, I can say it is very tiring but I could not imagine my life without them.
    Being a mother can be hard because it’s an added position on your life resume but mothers are some of the hardest working people
    in this world. We can work, clean our house, care for our kids and hubby, all this while trying to maintain a personal identity.
    But it is like a sorority of motherhood, I can instantly connect with other mothers on the subject of kids.
    *Mommybrain is real.

    -Jenny

  • Medicalstudent says:

    I noticed you said epidermal for anesthesia, but it’s actually called epidural* just letting you know :) thanks for sharing chriselle

  • Angelina says:

    Hi Chriselle-

    So excited you are doing this series. Was lucky enough to meet you when you were still pregnant with Chloe and love seeing how your blog is evolving with things going on in your life.

    Have been a fan of Momma Sohn’s mommy videos and am excited to see your posts too! I can’t completely relate to all mommy posts yet (such as birthing) since we are adopting our first child, but I still love hearing about people’s different experiences. Would love to see a post about things to do with an infant/toddler that are fun for both parents and child.

    xo, angelina

  • Anne says:

    Hi Chriselle,

    Thanks for sharing your tips and experiences. I am a new mommy too and my little girl is 3mths old. I watched your video about your miscarriage and it bought me to tears. You said it was very common but not something people want to share and that is true. I went thru the same and till this day not everyone close to me knows.

    I am grateful for gods little gift to me, she is perfect in everyway. I wouldn’t take back anything that might have been considered bad because we need to experience it to be a stronger mom.

    Can you share with us what your marriage is like after having a baby. What is your relationship with your hubby like? I have a great hubby that loves both of his girls to death and he was my world until I had a child. I now prioritise everything baby over my hubby. He doesn’t say anything because he understands however I’m sure he is sad at times about it. How do you balance being a mom, wife and work?

  • Michelle says:

    Thank you so much for sharing Chriselle. I am currently on my 27th week with my first child, and still clueless with what I need to prepare for the little one and myself. Your post definitely helps so much, and if you could do a post on must-haves for the baby and mom-to-be, it would be really helpful.

    I love following you on instagram and snapchat seeing how happy you are with Chole and wish I will be a mom like this, welcome challenges and boundless joy with grace and confidence like you.

  • Hi Chriselle!

    This is such an awesome post!!

    For your next post, I want to know how you and Allen knew when the time was right to have kids? I feel like I’m never gonna be ready.
    Also, what are other helpful ways to lose weight if you’re a mother who never has time for the gym? Thank you!

  • Sophia says:

    Glad to finally see something real out there from a glam blogger! We’ve all been there.
    Please do a post on how to get rid of the last 5lbs if you do get rid of it!

  • I have 3 boys under 5 and my life is CRAZY !! It’s great to have the blog as an outlet!
    xo Jaime
    http://www.therealfashionista.com

  • Tonya says:

    Dear Chriselle,

    Thanks for your honest and real posts.It makes your blog very real and heartwarming!Nice contrast to all the ‘perfect’ instagram-stories of other bloggers. I’m a mum of two little kids and having such a hard time to combine work and family.(Maybe a post on that?Some tips and trics?How to get enough of rest…).
    All the best for you! Greetings from Belgium.
    tonya

  • This is a great summary! It gets me scared a bit, but also kind of exciting when that day comes for me. I will be sharing this post with my friends who have recently given birth!

    http://www.theavantguardian.com

  • Kherington says:

    Thank you so much for this! I just entered my third trimester today and the fact that I will eventually have to deliver this baby is getting real! I haven’t had the typical by the book pregnancy so far, its been more of an emotional ride than a physical one for me. It is so nice to read about your experience since it’s pretty fresh and you’re going through it now. It helps me to kind of know what to expect (for the most part, especially since everyone is different). Keep the motherhood posts coming, you will definitely have a loyal reader in me. :)

  • gigi says:

    I really appreciate your post I believe that it’s very helpful. I am about 9 weeks and I just wanted to add something, constipation… omg.. I know it’s not a glamorous topic but a necessary one.
    thanks for all your great advice.
    ps Chole is so beautiful

  • Hi Chriselle

    I write to you as one of those that are not in this with you yet as I don’t got a child. But I wanted to let you know as you write that you don’t hope that this will scare us too much, that I am not scared and I enjoyed reading your blogposts. I have ever since I was a kid didn’t known what I wanted to do professionally, but I have always known that I wanted to be a wife and a mom. In nine days me and my boyfriend finally get to move in together so my wishes are going to happen, I just need to be patient, and because of that I think a lot about my wishes for my future these days. I have a problem that I am so extremely scared of hospitals, it’s a trauma back from when i was at a hospital last time (I was six), I therefore hope to be able to give birth at my appartment when that time finally comes one day, but then you know there will not be the same equitments, the same safety and I guess not the same days for recovering and nurses caring for the child. That I didn’t think about until I read your description, so that means that I need to get ready in a whole other way and I guess thats good to be prepared for.
    Besides that I realise that my thinking of motherhood might always have been a little too romantic, so it’s great to hear a more realistic view of the life with a little child. I am educating myself to work with small children but I will never in my work stumble across a newborn, so it’s good to know how you have already seen a change with Chloe and the bond to her father, it is amazing how quick they develop.
    I still can’t wait for this to happen to myself, but I am happy that people like you share the real life so I have someone to turn to when I finally get there. So thank you for preparing me. And the pictures of you and Chloe are gorgerous!!!

    Hugs,
    Amalie
    Denmark

  • Anu Jain says:

    Awww Jennifer!! Don’t lose heart! That resonates with me SO MUCH! My biggest fear is not being able to bounce back after having a baby but I’m sure you can figure it out girl! Where there’s a will, there’s a way!! We got you!!! :)

    Anu

  • Jennifer says:

    Hi Chriselle,

    I’m so happy to see that you started this series. I’ve been following your blog since the beginning of my pregnancy ( I just gave birth 6 weeks ago). Honestly, part of me was really down on myself after seeing how glamorous you looked right after giving birth! Your honesty and openness in this post are refreshing. For me personally, I’ve been struggling with my post-pregnancy body. I’ve always tried to eat right and stay fit, but now with a baby, I don’t know if I’ll ever have time to work out and have time for myself again. It’s pretty disheartening to see an extra layer of fat on my body and 20 extra pounds on the scale. If you could give some tips on getting your body back after giving birth, that would be great!

    Thank you,
    Jennifer

  • Anu Jain says:

    Chriselle,

    This post was fabulous!! I’m newly married and a couple of years away from motherhood but I absolutely CANNOT WAIT! My husband on the other hand, totally can! :)
    It was touching to hear all of these things and a bit scary for sure. I’ve never been very good at keeping fit, I go through yo yo phases so I really hope I can bounce back from pregnancy! You’re so inspiring as a person, blogger, and a mother! And I absolutely love love love Chloe’s snapchats. Keep them coming!

    XOXO Anu
    http://www.theteafortwo.com

  • Laura says:

    I’m newly pregnant for the first time and I’m dying over your old posts from when you were pregnant. You looked fabulous! I got very bloated very quickly and as a previously fit person, struggled with not having control to lose weight I wanted to. I’m well adjusted to the change now but still struggle with looking anything close to stylish in a daily basis. Oh well! The sacrifices will continue, I’m sure. Thanks for posting! Gave me some time to prepare for messy bathroom things postpartum?

  • Erica says:

    Hi Chriselle,

    Thanks for sharing your sincere post. I’m married and always imagined having 3-5 kids (what numbers, huh). As I’ve gotten older, the idea of children has become more overwhelming and I’ll be honest…it’s a little scary. And I know that the truth is that it IS hard. And nothing’s wrong with admitting it. Props to moms! I see so many mothers who only flaunt the glamorous or “cute” moments of having children. But what I love is when moms are transparent about the hardships. Because I want to be know and be ready for ALL of it. The joys and hard times…even better when people have a sense of humor about it! I imagine I’ll need a LOT of humor when it comes to the teenage years. Looking forward to Motherhood Mondays even as a non-mother!

  • May says:

    Great post. I was very well aware of a lot of things. I never imagined myself having a child when I was younger. I grew up babysitting others so I knew what to expect and what to do with small children. But I never watched a newborn 24/7. I had so many emotions from the day I found out I was pregnant to the day I had my c-section.
    I suffered from PPD. Never got diagnosed from a Dr. But I looked up the symptoms and I had majority of them. It was so hard for me at first. I felt like I was going to lose myself. I was angry, sad, happy, frustrated. I barely took photos of my pregnant belly. I was scared that I was going to miscarry my child. Lots of things running thru my mind. We had to to blood tests and we had an amniocentesis done to make sure my child wasn’t going to have down syndrome. Sigh… All if this and having to eat constantly, peeing all night was just so ugh…
    My better half always made sure he gave me comfort and held me when I was down. He always looked at this pregnancy as a blessing. I didn’t until I held her in y arms for the first time. It was great until we found out she had jaundice and her blood was incompatible with mines. I’m O+ and she was B+ so she had to be rushed to another hospital’s NICU. I cried so hard when I couldn’t go with her in the ambulance because I was recovering from my c-section. We were separated for 5 days. I cried for her everyday until I could hold her again. Called the NICU nurses at 3am and all other times of the day just to hear them say she is doing much better. I pushed myself to walk and get out of the hospital bed so I can check out and go see her. Daddy was so torn because both of his girls were in two different hospitals.
    When she was good to come home, the real struggle was to keep her food down. She was colicky and had gerd. I couldn’t get her to latch on when I had plenty of milk supply for her. I broke down in tears when I couldn’t pump fast enough to feed her and eventually got frustrated. I gave up breast milk even though I still have some til this day. She is 14 months now.
    I didn’t sleep good, couldn’t because I didn’t want to mess up cut where the incison was made. Afterwards, I got the IUD out in as soon as possible because I knew I wasn’t ready for another one. Lbvs
    It took me a good month before I was able to smile and be happy with what GOD had blessed me with. She is now a smart, sassy, Lil girl with a huge smile everyday. She brings out the best in me. And I would do it all again because it made me a stronger person. I’m so proud to be her mother. Congrats on your Lil bundle of joy and much success to all that you do.

    • Chriselle says:

      Hi May,
      Your heartbreaking story brought me to tears, you are so brave and courageous. I’m so thankful that you’re family is healthy and happy. Lots of love, Chris

  • Angelica says:

    Hey Chriselle !

    My name is Angélique, but in english (and Portuguese) it’s Angelica. I was born in Paris (and still live there) but my family, as old as i can go back in my family tree, is Portuguese ! I am 19 years old and i follow you since a year and a half now !

    I know that i am young to talk all about that mommy things but i wanted to thanks you ! Let me explain why : You shared all your story, the ups and downs, really everything ! And i suppose many young moms, many “old” moms, appreciated it ! But as a future mom, hopefully one day you know, you tell us the “truth”. You shared all the non-glamour reality, many peoples to there talk about the magic of being a mom but many forget about the down side !

    As i’ve been raised in the portuguese culture, having kids is a major things we have to do, like a goal ! I think it’s the same for every culture, but in latins one it’s something more for “women”, babies aren’t a “dude thing”. In the culture, they are waiting for you to stop your work and just raise kids ! And i respect a lot all the women who can be able to do it ! But you demonstrated that being a mommy is not easy everyday and you have to learn step by step how to be a super mom and still work and all that jam !

    So thank you for the beautiful posts and videos you make about all the process, for sharing the ups and downs and preparing all the future mommies out there ! I think i will thank you (and my mom ofc) even more one day in the future when it’s gonna be my “turn” for all the advices and the things i didn’t know before your experience with your beautiful and lovely Chloe and of course your supper cool husband !

    Lot of love for you and your little family from Paris and as we say in french, Bisous !
    Angelica.

    http://www.dslvfr.blogspot.fr

  • Danielle says:

    I find this post very useful! I don’t have babies yet, but I like to know as much as possible for the future. Thank you for sharing your experience!

    http://www.spring2spring.com

  • shirlyn says:

    How true are these 20 things! My baby boy is currently 2 months old. Even though things are pretty much on track, I’m still always having new things to learn as a new mom. It’s definitely scary at first postpartum having to deal with the overwhelming task of looking after a newborn and deal with your still frail body. It’s hilarious – like you, I thought my bump would automatically deflate postpartum so it was a scare for me when I saw how my bump stuck with me during the initial days. Luckily after some diligent binding, i was able up get it to “shrink” postpartum. Lucky me was able to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight about a month postpartum but perhaps it was due to me having gestational diabetes (GD) during pregnancy and having to control my diet. You didn’t mention GD so lucky you! It was a torture having to prick my fingers 4 times a day to test my blood glucose level. But for the sake of the baby, it was all worth it. And yes, the epidural. I can’t imagine the pain I have to go through without it. So glad you had it eventually, albeit late. Wonderful post about motherhood. Definitely looking to read future posts on it.

    https://sartorialisttoujours.wordpress.com

    • Chriselle says:

      Thank you so much Shirlyn! I have had friends with GD as well, props to you for sticking it out! Good luck with your little boy -xoxo

  • HI Chriselle!

    I’ve been a long time fan (more through your YouTube channel) but never really comment. This was so special of you to share. I don’t have any children of my own but my best friend and sister had babies last year and that’s been interesting to see them change. I love the quote you shared at the bottom about the Mother being new–that really touched me.

    Thanks for sharing some eye opening and sweet points and moments. It’s sweet to read about things you didn’t know of beforehand versus now (and also the connection Allan DIDN’T have at first, as I think that’s something I could relate to but now be prepared for :)

    Cheers,
    Amanda

    • Chriselle says:

      H Amanda! Thank you for being such a devoted follower and finally sharing, I truly appreciate it! I am so glad you received the blog post well, there is more to come -xo

  • Claire says:

    Hi! I am so looking forward to your real life mommy Monday’s! My name is Claire. I have two daughters Ariana, 5, and Emilia, 11 mo. I am so happy to hear you got through the challenging and beautiful pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding of your baby. What I didn’t know before becoming a mom was that it takes so much confidence! Trusting in your body to grow, birth, and feed your baby is half the battle. And the bathroom LOL! Girl, nobody told me about hemorrhoids! Hey, thanks for letting everyone know about breastfeeding and for making the nursing outfits video. I get lazy and just wear any loose neck shirt to whip me out and feed heranytime and anywhere but of course you always stay chic! Love it! Hang in there girl, and welcome to the sisterhood of mommyhood!!! <3

  • mae says:

    so true!! i never thought breastfeeding was painful at first..i had difficulty latching my baby so i had to stay in the hospital for three more days just so i can learn how to breastfeed.. i was about to give up after a week.. thank god for nipple covers….it all got better after two weeks or so…. im so thankful i persevered and did not give up…

  • Min says:

    Your post is spot on! I actually fell on this blog looking at maternity styles for baby two, but reading this post brings back all the memories of having the first daughter! I feel like I forgot so much because of the energy of a 2/3 year old keeps pregnancy now moving so quickly. The hair loss, the connecting, the whole work issue. Going back into work swing was hard, part of me wanted to not even think about work and the other wanted it for my sanity (colicky baby, angry two year old etc!) hahaha. I wish you the best in motherhood, it’s so beautiful, challenging and uplifting all at the same time. I’m really looking forward to these “Motherhood Monday” posts!

    • Chriselle says:

      Hi Min, so glad you shared your story, we mommies have to stick together! Good luck with your 2 kids you really are a super mom!

  • Emmabear says:

    Unfortunately, I never get to experience ‘natural’ birth. Both of my kids were delivered via C-section, not by choice! Yes, being a mommy is the most hardest job but also the most rewarding!

    I love reading your blog and you’re amazing! Keep up the good work.
    xoxo

  • Andrea says:

    i am not a mom or soon to be one, but I really like and apreciate the post! Im extremely scared to undergo pregnancy because of all the uncertainities but having better about what will happen makes me somehow calmer ❤️

  • Huong says:

    Your post is very real! I’ve also forgotten about all those things now that my kids r 5 & 7 yo… Your post reminded me of the bathroom pain!! OMG!! I didn’t want to ever go… I had to get laxatives to help, but even with everything softened, it was still unbearably painful! And mastitis was the other unbearably painful experience! And all those clogged milk ducts!! And not to mention not getting an epidural the 2nd time bc your labor is so quick the 2nd time around!! So letting u know ahead of time when you have your second, things will go so quick that you should get to the hospital asap and get that epidural in before it’s too late!! But like you said, with my “mommy brain”, I never really thought back at the hardship, and only remembered my kids being babies and how much I miss that stage!! I even miss being pregnant! It’s crazy how much we can endure just to have our little bundles of joy!!

  • sandy says:

    I loved your post! I am a soon to be mommy at 38 weeks pregnant and cannot wait for our little one to arrive. All I hope for is as natural a birth as possible and for the little one to be healthy. Your points on birth and motherhood were really helpful and if there is a day or two in the coming month where I can look as glamourous as you and your baby, I will be a happy stylish mommy!

  • Monika says:

    I have to admit that this post did scare me a little. Still, I’m someone who was pretty much all ready freaked out my pregnancy so it’s not really your fault it’s more just an issue I have. I’ve been trying to wrap my brain around it because I love kids and my guy and I definitely want a little foursome so we’ll see what happens. I know it’ll all be worth it in the end once you get to hold your bundle of joy but the journey to that point sounds so daunting to me. I always love how honest you are and even if its a bit scary I’d rather hear the highs and lows instead of just the fairytale of the glowing mom that you see.

    -M
    http://www.violetroots.com

    • Chriselle says:

      Hi Monika! LOL don’t get scared, you are going to get through it and see the beauty of it all, your man will totally be there for you! Best of luck.

  • Rhea says:

    Hi Chriselle! Thank you for your lovely, honest post. I am not planning on having a baby anytime soon, but going through this makes me feel so proud of my mother for going through all of this.. twice! Loved this post!
    xx
    http://www.fuss.co.in

  • Wilo says:

    Great list! I’m a mom of a 15 1/2 year old daughter and 12 year old son and I will turn 40 next month. This list was spot on! And you are absolutely right about the sorority of moms–we have all been there and even though I’m way past the baby days, I still totally get it. And yes, there is also a lot I forgot too! Enjoy your sweet baby girl–every stage of their growing up years is enjoyable in its own way–even for me, now with a teen and tween! :) Best to you!

    • Chriselle says:

      Hi Wilo, thank you for reassuring me about Chloe, I get so sad seeing her grow up so fast, but excited to see her finally sit up and crawl! Lots of love, Chris

  • sylvia mireles says:

    Thank you for this post Chriselle. I am a soon to be mommy 10 weeks prego and have been following you for two years. You are a huge inspiration :)

  • Kate says:

    Love how honest and open you are with your journey as a Mom, so special.

    Kate

    See how much fun we had at our BBQ!

    http://www.lamiabellavita.com

  • La Bijoux Bella | by mia says:

    The one infinite thing from the story told is the truth “the awful truth”. Despite of all the daunting mountains that you had to climb to get to the top, but you emerged beyond boundaries and evolved into a more knowledgeable, more understanding, more passionate and perhaps still a learning process as a true woman, a true survivor, a warrior at the softest heart, an adaptation fills a vision and reflecting of a new mother who has a newfound love . . . And endless Love. :)
    Wishing you all the very best & Grazie for sharing such a bravery story.

    La Bijoux Bella | by mia

  • kai says:

    Hi Chriselle,

    Thank you for being honest about real life and motherhood. Maybe next topic can be about accepting the new changes.

  • sasa says:

    oh my, you are amazing! XO

    Shall We Sasa

  • #MommyBrain for real! Such a great list – I’m looking forward to the rest of this series!

  • kai says:

    Thank you

  • Comments are closed